A separation, perimenopause, a migration, the death of someone you love, children leaving home, a job that no longer represents you. The trigger changes, but the map looks very similar. Naming what is moving already calms part of the chaos.
What usually moves
It no longer responds the same
You sleep differently, you tire sooner, what used to work stops working. If something worries you, see your doctor; and in the meantime, listen to it.
Noise without rest
You go round in circles, it's hard to decide, you forget small things. The mind tries to solve what doesn't have a shape yet.
Waves you don't understand
You cry for no apparent reason, or feel anger where there used to be patience. Sometimes you feel nothing, and that weighs too.
Everything rearranges
When you change, your place changes too: in your family, your partnership, your friendships. Some relationships grow with you. Others don't.
And now what?
What used to give you meaning is no longer enough. This is the most uncomfortable question, and also the most fertile.
Where to begin
Read all five and choose just one: the one that weighs most today. Not all five. One. Give yourself a week to pay attention to it, without forcing yourself to fix it. Write down what comes up.
Often, when one finds a little order, the others begin to breathe.
You aren't broken. You are in the middle of something that doesn't have a shape yet.
I have passed through that place where nothing fits several times: after migrating, after losing my mother, after losing my son's father. What I learned is that the disorder isn't the end of the road. Very often, it is the beginning.